Circling the Drain

Content Labels: Mental Illness

The body tells me that we are in pain;

the mind confirms that it feels the same.

Take it easy a while; don't do too much;

Seems like good advice to relax a bunch.

But nothing on the schedule means nothing on the mind;

Nothing to do means rest is undermined.

Boredom is dangerous; quiet is risky.

All the mind's worries get riled up and frisky.

Worrisome thoughts shifts mood both quiet and cranky;

Even loving and helpful suggestions irritate, frankly.

Painful body and painful mind;

Cranky me continues to complain.

So I push away friends and push away lovers

To cower in bed crying underneath covers.

I'll push away attempts to make me feel good

To protect those I care about from my own foul mood.

Nothing I want so much as to sleep it away;

Nothing I need so much as to get past today.

Because I'm alone my mind circles the drain;

Because I'm not moving there's more physical pain.

It's a terrible circle, one I recognize,

But still follow along with empty eyes.